Dear 30 year old self

I’ve been meaning to write to you, but haven’t had the strength to. See a few years ago things got really tough, random feelings of hopelessness that just wouldn’t go away. I hope you aren’t feeling that too.

I want to believe that you are in a better place, that everything is making alot more sense now but I feel like I wouldn’t be realistic so here it is;

Dear Laura, I hope you are okay, that you haven’t lost your smile. I hope the world has been kind enough to you, atleast allowed you to breathe without pain.

I hope that the aspects that were in your control are flourishing, that you have acquired more skills and grown in tenacity.

I hope you have learned to shield yourself from negativity. Emotions that made you spiral and question your very existence.

I hope that you are a little happier than I am right now. That you are a better version of me.

I hate writing to future versions in fear that they may me in worse state but I want to believe that with you it will be different.

So I send you all the love I have within me and keep you in my prayers on a daily. I am working as hard as I can to make sure that you are in a better place. And if you aren’t, remember that I tried…